Friday, March 14, 2008

Suggestions for Clinton’s “Kitchen Sink” Campaign

Intrigued by Hillary Clinton’s “Kitchen Sink” Campaign, we suggest the entire Presidential race be won through the battle of various household items. Although the saying may be "everything but the kitchen sink", Barak Obama's 11 straight primary victories forced Clinton to use the last resort; the kitchen sink. It turns out to be her weapon of choice after winning the March 3rd primaries in Ohio and Texas. 
pedestal tub

Clinton’s Ohio and Texas primary victories are going to require Obama to come back with something bigger than the kitchen sink. An appreciate rebuttal for Obama in theme with appliances, yet adding a twist, would be to forget the kitchen and move to the bathroom. Being a specialist in both the kitchen and bathroom industry, we suggest the bathtub. Obama can show his chrome claws with a classic acrylic clawfoot tub, which is light weight making it easy to transport, unlike the traditional cast iron. With extra hands from his supporters, he can use the pedestal tub to guarantee a win.

As for Clinton, if she is thinking about using her victory weapon for the remainder of the race, she should change things up for each debate. Although she has been training for this race for years, her arm is going to be tired and sore when November finally rolls around. She should consider using a lighter sink, such as a stainless steel sink but using a gooseneck faucet to hook Obama closer so she won’t have to worry about the distance. Or she can opt to end the race early by taking Obama out with a fireclay kitchen sink. This adds a classy touch (as if throwing kitchen sinks isn't classy enough) and will be a one-punch knockout.